We live in an interesting world. Everything is right at our finger tips. We can access just about anything instantly. Along with this comes having to learn how to discern what is real and what is not. We see people’s posts boasting of fabulous trips, new and shiny possessions, perfect families and so on. Even if you know people are only posting the best, you can not help but compare yourself. For some of us that comparison is a fleeting moment in time. It barely gets a notice on the radar of life. But for others this comparison rips their soul out. Suddenly they have thoughts about not being good enough, how they are failures, and how there is no hope for them. If they could only do this better or quit doing that then they too can have a life that this person on social media.
But here is the thing…we have no way of knowing what is really is happening with that person we are comparing ourselves to. For all we know they are in debt up to their eye balls or perhaps that perfect marriage they boast of is riddled with affairs and quarrels. But even beyond the notion you can not judge a book by its cover, who is to say what we have to offer is not good enough. Who says that the life we have isn’t worth living?
Each of us were designed to be unique. There are no two humans exactly alike. We are special. We may bond over areas in our life that are similar but the ways we are different are what sets us apart. Our uniqueness, our differences are what makes us special. Here are some tips for embracing your unique design:
1. Establish YOUR identity: Explore what makes you…you. What are the features, characteristics, talents, etc that come together to make you who you are?
2. Be more self-positive: Embracing yourself in a positive way means you have to start speaking kindly to and about yourself. You need to toot your own horn and be proud of who you are.
3. Get active: Get out there are do. Do what you are passionate about. Do things that represent your values. Put actions to your words.
4. Forget what others think of you: Stop looking to others for validation. Just because some one thinks something about you does not mean it is true. Let your identity be created by you not what others think about you.
5. Do things you never do! Be brave and take a risk. All you need is 20 seconds of insane courage to take that leap to do something new. You would be surprised how this will energize you and help lead you to the next level of your life.
Until next time….
Change. Discover. Transform.
Carla Carter, Ed.D., LCPC, CMPC, EMDR Certified